Wednesday, July 2, 2008

The Same Schedule



I heard a rumor once. It goes a little something like this:

When more than one woman lives in the same room/house/apartment/etc., they tend to find themselves playing to the same tune. And by playing to the same tune, I mean marching to the same beat. And anybody who knows anything knows that by marching to the same beat I mean howling at the moon together at the same time.

Although scientific evidence isn't conclusive, I know that this rumor is true because my mother told me about this. Yes, my mother, the same woman who told me that if I swallowed watermelon seeds as a child that the seeds would sprout into a watermelon in my stomach. In effect, those watermelons would have killed me. So yeah, that's just my way of saying that my mother is never wrong.

Back to women, just like the ones featured below:
They love each other.

Scientists don't know crap when they only rely on tests ran in laboratories. I can tell you from firsthand experience that the "schedules" of young women begin to match up after a while. I can tell you this, because I live with multiple members of the opposite sex. No scientist in the world has ever been cool enough to live with a member of the opposite sex.

When I first moved in, one of my roommates would hate me in the middle of the month, while the other would curse my existence toward the end of the month. But now that we've all lived together for nearly a year, I've noticed that it has become a month-long hatefest. And once, when they thought I was fast asleep, I saw them both looking at the full moon while doing some odd type of female ritual that involved giggling and gossiping.

Even my mother and my sister engage in such odd behavior when I'm visiting home. Women and their moods change just like the tide. So I just keep my head down and steer clear of their wrath when that special "schedule" time comes. Dare I call this cycle a vicious cycle? Yes. I accept my own dare.

But in all seriousness, aside from them being mean to me and making me take out the trash and making me kills bugs and making me fend off burglars and making me open tightly sealed jars and making me piss sitting down, living with girls totally rocks. If you haven't done so yet, you haven't lived.

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