Monday, April 21, 2008

Men for Manicures



Sometimes a guy justs want to feel refreshed. Sometimes a guy just wants to be pampered. Sometimes a guy is secretly ashamed of the horrendous shape that his cuticles are in and wants to do something about it. Sometimes, a guy simply needs to get a manicure. And I'm not ashamed to say that I'M THAT GUY!

Today, I stumbled into a free manicure. I'd rather not disclose the details of this free manicure. But I will say that cameras flashed and pictures were taken of me having my hands rubbed down with lotion. However, I did not try to duck or hide my face. Instead, I smiled. I was proud to be sitting in that chair. I was proud of the conversation I had with Nisha, the professional manicurist who studied anthropology at Davis and plans on taking a trip to London with her mother this Summer to take a hair styling course. And more than anything, I was proud of my hands. Nisha oiled them up like they had never been oiled before. She gave me a hand massage and painted that clear stuff on my nails to make them all shiny. Of course the clear stuff came after she buffed them up and grinding down my unkempt nails. She jokingly offered me a pink coat of nail polish. I flatly said 'no thanks.' Despite being surrounded by women, I felt manlier than ever.

Now don't run and tell folks that I'm Metro. I'm not prepared to go that far. But my mother always told me that there were two things that women paid close attention to when choosing a man: 1) his shoes and 2) his hands.

Unfortunately, she failed to tell me that those women are really paying attention to the size of the shoe, how much enjoyment would be derived from holding the hand and its ability to carry bags while, and the contents of all financial accounts that are accessed via use of the said hand. But that's neither here nor there...

I'm challenging any man who reads this extremely manly blog to go out and have a manicure. I dare you! Challenge yourself. If you dislike the manicure I'll personally treat you to a massage at the sketchy massage parlor in your neighborhood.

So no matter what the outcome, Happy Endings will be had by all!

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